Thursday, April 24, 2003
Today I am dressed like a total fop. All I lack is a tennis racket and sweater to tie around my neck.
Wednesday, April 23, 2003
Do you think it's easy to carry this much animosity around all day? No way, Jose! It takes a lot of back pain, coffee, and despair.
Brief Descriptions of My Friends, Part 3
I have a friend in Grand Rapids, Michigan named Addison. He's Damien's older brother (see Brief Descriptions of My Friends, Part 1, 4/18/2003). Addison and I were roommates at NYU, so we've seen each other naked and pretended not to. He's probably the biggest influence on my diet, my inaccessible taste in music, and my habit of saying "Dude, seriously...". The man rode a frickin' horse into his own wedding, and he's not even a Texan! During the day, he manages accountants and listens to Slayer. Simply put, better men do not exist. He is married to an absolute angel named Meena, and together they are perfection. They have one son named Kavi and another child on the way, who are both very lucky to have the parents they do. In fact, in a parallel universe, Addison and my dad are partnered super-heroes who battle bad parenting.
He's also definitely better looking than any male reading this.
Shit. I wish I was Addison.
Tuesday, April 22, 2003
"The fire I feel for you in my heart burns almost as hot as the urine I piss ever since the last time we made love."
Monday, April 21, 2003
"Writing about music is like dancing about architecture - it's a really stupid thing to want to do."
--Elvis Costello, in an interview by Timothy White entitled "A Man out of Time Beats the Clock." Musician magazine No. 60 (October 1983), p. 52.
This guy, Ernie Cline, makes me laugh!
"And we didn't have any fancy Sony Playstation video games
with high-resolution 3-D graphics.
We had the Atari 2600!
With games like Space Invaders and Asteroids.
And the graphics sucked ass!
Your guy was just a square!
You had to use your imagination!
And there were no multiple levels or screens.
It was just ONE screen, forever,
and you could never win.
The game just kept getting harder and faster until you died.
Just like LIFE!
Those video games built character, Sonny Jim!"
- from "When I Was a Kid"
Visit his site! He's brilliant! http://www.ernestcline.com/
This weekend a friend pointed out that she once saw me with my former girlfriend and I looked absolutely miserable and diplomatic. Not only does that perfectly describe my role in that relationship, but how I handle stress in general: miserable and diplomatic. I'm putting that on my business cards.
BigSleep666: Misery and Diplomacy
Brief Descriptions of My Friends, Part 2
I have a friend in Brooklyn named Meirav. Super smart and interesting, Meirav is, without a doubt, the coolest woman I know. Just today she sent me a link to http://www.autopsybabies.com. A working writer, she has written for children, hip-hopsters, and perverts. She only wants the best for me, and is constantly disappointed with my taste in women. Best Meirav quote off the top of my head: "The girls you think are cute: A) have short hair and B) are not cute." We both know I'm not man enough for her, and to save me from any embarrassment in pushing that envelope is her husband Eddie, who, despite Meirav's historically and admittedly wrong taste in men, is a super nice guy who could kick your ass, and wants to. He's a NYC Port Authority cop, to boot, peeing all over her CRASS t-shirts in her teenage closet. Today is their three year wedding anniversary! Congrats!
--Elvis Costello, in an interview by Timothy White entitled "A Man out of Time Beats the Clock." Musician magazine No. 60 (October 1983), p. 52.
This guy, Ernie Cline, makes me laugh!
"And we didn't have any fancy Sony Playstation video games
with high-resolution 3-D graphics.
We had the Atari 2600!
With games like Space Invaders and Asteroids.
And the graphics sucked ass!
Your guy was just a square!
You had to use your imagination!
And there were no multiple levels or screens.
It was just ONE screen, forever,
and you could never win.
The game just kept getting harder and faster until you died.
Just like LIFE!
Those video games built character, Sonny Jim!"
- from "When I Was a Kid"
Visit his site! He's brilliant! http://www.ernestcline.com/
This weekend a friend pointed out that she once saw me with my former girlfriend and I looked absolutely miserable and diplomatic. Not only does that perfectly describe my role in that relationship, but how I handle stress in general: miserable and diplomatic. I'm putting that on my business cards.
BigSleep666: Misery and Diplomacy
Brief Descriptions of My Friends, Part 2
I have a friend in Brooklyn named Meirav. Super smart and interesting, Meirav is, without a doubt, the coolest woman I know. Just today she sent me a link to http://www.autopsybabies.com. A working writer, she has written for children, hip-hopsters, and perverts. She only wants the best for me, and is constantly disappointed with my taste in women. Best Meirav quote off the top of my head: "The girls you think are cute: A) have short hair and B) are not cute." We both know I'm not man enough for her, and to save me from any embarrassment in pushing that envelope is her husband Eddie, who, despite Meirav's historically and admittedly wrong taste in men, is a super nice guy who could kick your ass, and wants to. He's a NYC Port Authority cop, to boot, peeing all over her CRASS t-shirts in her teenage closet. Today is their three year wedding anniversary! Congrats!
Sunday, April 20, 2003
In response to recent developments in my life: "WHAT?!"
Last night I went to see a band called The Dirty Three. The frontman violinist is named Warren Ellis. As people were shouting their favorite song requests, towards the end of the night someone shouted "TRANSMETROPOLITAN!" which is the name of a great comic book written by a different Warren Ellis (writer of Stormwatch, The Authority, Planetary, etc.). I like to think I was the only one there who got that joke.
"Oh, c'mon! I am pulling cleverness out of my ass for you!"
Three things I learned before 12:00 noon today:
1) Sometimes squirrels groom one another and it's frickin' adorable.
2) If you freeze soy creamer and allow it to defrost, it's completely useless, though you may still use it in your coffee, because you don't like to waste food.
3) They make dog leashes for joggers that strap around your waist, so you can jog hands-free on the path around Barton Creek with your Boston terrier as she runs out ahead of you, but she may become distracted by my dog, which may make you fall down.
Yesterday, as I was shopping for band-aids, I noticed that there is a hemorrhoid cream called Anusol. In fact, here's some now:
A medication you apply to your ass that one would quite rightly pronounce "Anus Hole." I would be willing to bet that the brainiac responsible for naming that product earns a higher salary than me.
My dog thinks the outside world is saturated in urine and that it's fascinating and he's wrong on both accounts.
Conversations with My Dog:
SmallDog666: No, you don't understand: something has pissed on this leaf.
BigSleep666: Yeah, I fucking get it! Let's go!
BigSleep666: What are you doing in there?!
SmallDog666: I am trying to adopt a family of ticks!
BigSleep666: What are you doing?!
SmallDog666: I... I DON'T KNOW!
Last night I went to see a band called The Dirty Three. The frontman violinist is named Warren Ellis. As people were shouting their favorite song requests, towards the end of the night someone shouted "TRANSMETROPOLITAN!" which is the name of a great comic book written by a different Warren Ellis (writer of Stormwatch, The Authority, Planetary, etc.). I like to think I was the only one there who got that joke.
"Oh, c'mon! I am pulling cleverness out of my ass for you!"
Three things I learned before 12:00 noon today:
1) Sometimes squirrels groom one another and it's frickin' adorable.
2) If you freeze soy creamer and allow it to defrost, it's completely useless, though you may still use it in your coffee, because you don't like to waste food.
3) They make dog leashes for joggers that strap around your waist, so you can jog hands-free on the path around Barton Creek with your Boston terrier as she runs out ahead of you, but she may become distracted by my dog, which may make you fall down.
Yesterday, as I was shopping for band-aids, I noticed that there is a hemorrhoid cream called Anusol. In fact, here's some now:
A medication you apply to your ass that one would quite rightly pronounce "Anus Hole." I would be willing to bet that the brainiac responsible for naming that product earns a higher salary than me.
My dog thinks the outside world is saturated in urine and that it's fascinating and he's wrong on both accounts.
Conversations with My Dog:
SmallDog666: No, you don't understand: something has pissed on this leaf.
BigSleep666: Yeah, I fucking get it! Let's go!
BigSleep666: What are you doing in there?!
SmallDog666: I am trying to adopt a family of ticks!
BigSleep666: What are you doing?!
SmallDog666: I... I DON'T KNOW!
